What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

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A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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A man walks into a bar and breaks his nose, he asks the bartender for help The bartender says "no you're a f***ing idiot"

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

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What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Call the police to have him escorted off the boat for operating a large veichle under the influence of alcohol.

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What's red and can sing? Elmo

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why did the mexican cross the road? to get to the lawn mowing shop becuase his wife has breast cancer, and he cant pay the bills sitting on his butt and getting a check from the government every month

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What's the meaning of life? I don't know.

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Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

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Q: What's the worst part about having sex with a cougar? A: Dying...

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How do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

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why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

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how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

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What does Steven Hawking and Justin Bieber have in common? Absolutely nothing.

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Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

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I once had a friend We had our arguments, and went our separate ways.

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What did the man say to the ugly woman? Your face makes my penis soft.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops