Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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What walks on the three legs? Martin, he was born with a tragic birth defect and struggles to make a living.

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What's worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust.

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What is green and has wheels???? Yo mamma on a Wednesday.

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

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When life gives you limes, say hey! wait a second ,aren't these meant to be lemons? then kill yourself

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why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

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How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

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What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

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Democracy.

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What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

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Knock knock Whos there your son your son who holy shit dad just let me in

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What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

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A man goes to the movies with his wife, two hours later they drive home and find their house just the way they left it.

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Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

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How many Mexicans can you fit in a Smart car? None. It's too damn small!

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What did the moose say to the photographer? Moose say cheese.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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A little boy had a candle by his bedside. It fell over. The candle was fake, and it didn't burn down his house. When he woke up, he picked up the candle, put it back on his nightstand and had a wonderful day.

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When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

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what looks like a banana? a penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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