What's wet and sticky? I don't know, glue or something.

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Why did the guy go to the strip club? To look at naked people.

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Kirstie Alley is soooo fat! How fat is she? Well, she's so fat that she's in grave danger of developing heart disease, and death

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Why did samba hurt her head? Because she fell out of her mum muff

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What did the blind quadriplegic get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What has four wheels and flies? A pile of poop that's on four wheels.

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Why did the black man walk into the catholic church? He was catholic.

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A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell into a well? Nothing. She died upon impact and her family mourned her death for years.

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What did Queen Victoria say when she saw a zombie? "Quick everybody, run, that is a zombie."

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Want to hear a dirty joke? The horse fell in the mud

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what do you call white people running down a mountain? Avalanche What do you call black people running down a mountain? Jailbreak

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What comes out of a zit? Purple poop.

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Why did George Bush climb the Statue of Liberty? I'm not sure, as this incident is not covered in any of the myriad books written about his administration.

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What happens if you punch a girl? An equal rights protest.

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How did Chris die? Bush-fire

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A Mormon walks into a bar.

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What day is it? Asked the man with a gun who dislikes music. Friday. Mostly because yesterday was thursday and tomorrow is Saturday. Sunday comes afterwards also. The man says "oh. I thought it was Tuesday."

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Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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what do you call a black guy african american

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What's the difference between a stepfather and a turkey? A stepfather is a man who married a woman who has already had a family with another man but the man does not mind because he has fallen deeply in love with her and wants to spend the rest of his life with the woman. A turkey is completely different in many respects.

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What do you call a room with an oven and ten Jews in it? A kitchen.

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Yo' momma so fat she buys clothingthat is bigger than most other people's clothing

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Is it better to be born black or gay? No way to know. That is, unless you are black and gay.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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