A man told another,"You suck." The insulted man finished the sentence,"On juice boxes."

-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some roses are white 72.4% of Americans are too

identical jokes get different votes.

Your mom is so old she died

What is green and can hurt your eyes? I don't know, but its definitely not a laser pointer.

Why is the sky blue? Because it is

Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

What does a shortstop do when the ball is by third base? He leaves the field to go to the hospital, his little sister just had a heart attack.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, and so do I.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

what did the indians give the pilgrims? syphylis

What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

Q: why was the baker a coward? A: his own mother told him his potential would amount to nothing more than a baker and when a dinosaur came into the bakery he ran away

why couldnt the guy move his legs cuz he was paralyzed

one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

Why dose my mom have a penis? She is a man

your mommas so stupid she tried to climb mountain dew well im glad your mom is intrested in trying new things

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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