- Anti Joke

I got into an argument with my friend the other day. He contested that the onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I beat his wife to death with a coconut,

Whats small white and has a hole in it? A powdered Donut

Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What do you call a cat with no ears? Anything you fucking well like. Cats can't understand speech.

What happends when two gay guys want to have kids? They can't, so they go to an orphanage and adopt one.

The cream, it is coming

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

Why did the flight attendant look scared every time every time she saw a muslim get on the airplane? Because her family got murdered in front of her before she came to work

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'who the f*ck let a horse in here, get it out now'.

3 men walk into a bar. The 4th one ducks.

A black man is like a sledge hammer; if you compare him to a sledge hammer, he will hit you with a sledge hammer.

Why was the baby flying? Because it's face was stapled to the propeller of a helicopter.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

What word starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person? Neighbor.

i had sex.

Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

What is worse than being lost in the supermarket? Being lost in space.

Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

whats worse than watching your house burn to the ground? Sarah Palin becoming president

What do you call a cow without legs? Disabled.

Why was Timmy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face

That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.