Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

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Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

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I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

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What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

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What is a frogs favorite drink? Water.

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A new scientific study has scientists baffled as it clearly shows that teen sex drastically decreases at age 20.

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3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

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What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? Because he got hit by a bus.

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Q-What was Hitlers favorite hobby to proceed in when he was sad? A- Manipulating populations and raping,torturing and mutilating the Jewish population.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: WHERE'S MY TRACTOR?!

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How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

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See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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A chinese man walks into a kitten store. He is a nice man in search of a companion.

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Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

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Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

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there were ten in the bed and the little one said roll over so they all rolled over and one fell out then got back up and punched the little one in the face saying good night

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How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

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A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

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Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

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Why wouldn't anyone want Helen Kellers dog? It's been buried for a long time...

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What do you call a house full of Mexicans? A house

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops