Why did children rejoice when Michael Jackson died? Because they were at a birthday party, and only heard about his death afterward.

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why did the man pee in public? ... he couldnt hold it in.

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

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whats the best part about ebola? nothing ebola is a dangerous virus

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800 people died last year. end of story

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How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

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sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Are you a tree? A: No.

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Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

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What happened after Jimmy fell off the cliff? He died.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

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What did the woman say when she didn't finish her meal? Can I get a to go box

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What's wheels and has green? Lied, I grassed about the wheels.

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one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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Justin's life

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what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

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What do you put your key on? A key chain.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

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joe galasso from plainview ny

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When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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