anti jokes are really funny

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Q: What did the psychopath dream about? A: An insane chimpanzee kicking his head off, or maybe something normal

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What's red, green and smells like crap? Green and red crap.

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What did the 80 year old man do to celebrate valentines day with his wife? Nothing, Alzheimer's made him forget about Valentines day.....and that he was married. What did his wife do for Valentines day? Killed herself.

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Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

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jordan godfrey is good looking lolololol

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What did the genie say to the man that rubbed the magic lamp? Nothing, genies don't exist.

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A working black man, Santa, and the Easter Bunny where walking down the street and find a penny, who picks it up? The working black man, Santa and the Easter Bunny take no payment for their work.

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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Why did the car crash? The driver was female.

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roses are green, violets are yellow, I am a hybridizer.

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When life gives you lemons, you throw them at your friends. If they throw them back, duck

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Why did Sally fall off a tree? The tree was a man wearing a tree costume and was sexually assaulting her with his branches. Sally fell off because the cops came and the man threw her down. The tree man is still on the loose. If you have any info please call crime stoppers.

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Knock knock, "Whos there" a business man who wants to sell you things that you don't need "Oh, go away"

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roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

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Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

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What did the orphan get for christmas........Cancer

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Ducks smell too dog like animal farms riverside Chinese tofu hat hairy and eat beanie.

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your mama's so ugly, she suffers from chronic deppression.

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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Why did the garbage man cross the road? He was doing his job.

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Why did the girl start crying? Her pet sunflower had just died.

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Q; what did the gangster say after he and his gang robbed a bank? A;Hey boys lets go drink some soy milk (After that his gang killed him) but the moral of the story is to not rob banks or take drugs

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What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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