So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

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Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

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Why did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? Peppers help strengthen his immune system.

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Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem is stupid.

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A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

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What? I didn't say anything. Yes you did.

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If life gives you lemons, You have a problem and you might need medicine.

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why did the chicken cross the road who's there and the man died of cancer congradulations! your preganant

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was suicidal.

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Why don't black people ever defend themselves on anti jokes? Because black people are slaves.

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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Sigh... I gotta go to night class studies okay?

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Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

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You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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What would Bruno Mars do if he was on the moon? Gasp and grab his throat in an attempt to get oxygen flowing into his lungs with no avail.

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i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

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An asian man and a black man were having a conversation. The asian man sneezed. The black man got SARS and he died shortly after.

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My wife told me that I should see things from a woman's point of view. So I looked out the kitchen window.

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*Wear a Mario costume* What happened to Luigi? I ate him.

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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