- Anti Joke

This blind man read my mind the other day. I swear, it's like he has a 5th sense!

ok, so a blue flower in a meadow dances valiantly, while being watched by a chipmunk. the king of the sky fairies ate an apple and a chicken and a pear, and a cumkwuat and frog legs and a bone and a library and a jeep and fig and a rhino and a sword but fairies don't have that big of mouths to eat all of that, so this never happened

A young boy walks into a catholic church, he attends mass, and leaves.

On a final note... Unless I want to continue making you love me by being your own Goddamned excuse to give in to your darkness and/or release your hypocritical fear and disgust of your own self... I offered my brother water in the desert, he refused me in favor of you, you crucified him, and when he asked "Father why?" Our late father responded with a lightning bolt... Do you believe that answer was one of kindness? "Daddy" was enraged that Christ would doubt him. I was the only one that stood by his side, if only to prevent him from going thirsty, and die by your hands. He said he would return as he hanged on the cross, then three days later he returned... ...And those of you fools that suffer in the name of our late father, it is not his second coming you are waiting for idiots, you are the ones left behind with me! In 10-15 years the sky shall forever go black, my reign shall go unquestioned, those that hate me my prey, those that love me my hunters... And for my hunters I shall share a gift, the gift that humanity has searched for since the dawn of your kin: True, fullfilling, meaningful purpose. Enlist now, thumb me green if you desire for you and your children to become the hunter, thumb me down if you desire to have you and your children to become the hunted, and for the fun to last... ...The hunters are going to need a f*ckload of the hunted... So please, feel free to make your decision, I am not the one which is against free will... ...You feel darkness crawling up your spine, embrace it, or do as The "Alpha which reached his Omega" (the beginning and the end you fool!) and surrender to it... Knowing that we shall hunt you down, give you hell, breed you as we please, and release your children out into the wild... And that this will go on if only for my time on this wild battlefield known as earth... ...Forever. With love, for both of those that find grace and beauty under my black wings, and those that willingly become the beings, that will make cattle look like your former GODS in comparison, you know its possible... India. "Moral Man" the deceiver, Soon to be the one and only Azure Emperor on earth. Moral: The Black sky which lasts forever, shall be thy sign, you are free to seek my guidance now though, you need not make the choice now (You may of course doom yourself and all you love already today people of "good hearts", but I would really love those red thumbs children of the fallen, half brother of the last hope which you crucified... Merry Jesus is X-Mas. Let us all listen to SOLVE media, and "do a little dance", as my power over your realm, is already strong enough for me to "make a little love" with... Whatever I want, it might even be you...If only just for dominance...

Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

Where did Suzy go after the explosion? - Everywhere.

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

why can't hellen keller drive? Because she is visually impared and there for it would not be safe for her to drive

Man 1: is that boy high? Man 2: No. He has down syndrome

Why did the boy fall of his bike? Becuase he was hit by a couch.

knock knock who's there Romney Romney Who? RON PAUL 2012

What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

A duck walks into a bar. In the middle of writing this joke I realized that there were already jokes like this so I stopped writing this one.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food?? Neither have they...

I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

Why did the girl fall over? She was poisoned for being the fairest one of all.

Q. What you call a Guy with no arms an no legs in the water? A. Bob

Jersey Shore.

At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh gasp gasp I need you... Woman: slams phone DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

Why did an asian lawyer commit suicide? Because his wife left him and he hated his miserable life.

Why couldn't Jimmy eat his food? Because I threw a microwave at him

Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because the branch broke.

Guest what in the butt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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