How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

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There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

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Why is my penis 2 inch hard? Because I rape little boys with it and there tight little asshole are crushing it

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The diamond one below is hilarious.

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How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm not good at poems, nice tits.

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Why was the gay man gay? Because he likes touching other guys penises

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What did the horse say to the man? The man woke up from his dream so he didn't know either

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Three Jew begin to walk down the street, they then pursue walking and purchase many goodies from vendors.

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Terminator XXXIVXXX Regensisysydioniosis. Watch as the terminators return in this year`s summer blockbuster, they return to a time before the birth of Connors grandfather and manage to destroy the world, then the only decision left is for humanity in another timeline to travel back as the terminators are destroyed, but they travel back again so that! But that wont happen before Terminator: Los Pollos Hermanos.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

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Your mother is so fat that she has a very big butt and large breasts, which is quite attractive to some men, especially if they are open-minded.

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A blonde walks into a bar. She got free drinks.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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color blind person solves a rubix cube just kidding thier color blind

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? It was taped to the other monkey

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why did the boy scream? because he got shot.

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Why didn't Jenny's mom give her any Christmas presents? She was a selfish, mean, woman and didn't care about her children.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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why did the small boy drop his ice cream ? because he has no hands

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Why did the man cross the road He didn't, he died after being hit by a car

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Do you know any anti-jokes. Yeah, I do. It's a bit pointless though.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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