What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

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Why'd the black man smell awful... Because he hadn't showered in multiple days

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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What's the difference between Tom and Jerry? One is a cat, and the other is a mouse.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Freddie Mercury died of AIDS. Many consider him a musical hero.

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

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HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

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How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

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Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

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What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

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why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

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A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

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WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

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What's red and can't speak ? A strawberry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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