Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

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It's all fun and games until you stop having fun

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noah is a scrub jungle

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Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

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What do you call a black man who works in a ice-cream truck? A Ice-Creem Man

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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This would be racist to black people if they could read.

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How do you eat a candy cane? Shove it in your mouth and chew.

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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How do you turn that frown upside down? You move many muscles in your face.

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What's funny to laugh at dying? JEWS!

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Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

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what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

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why did the homeless man die? because everyone does.

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What did the black man do when KFC got his order wrong? He gave his receipt to the cashier and kindly asked for the correct meal.

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What do you call a blue horse with two legs and five eyes? A blue horse with two legs and five eyes.

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Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

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What did the clown say when he was denied health insurance? Nothing, he died of his pre-existing heart condition.

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Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Not because she had no arms, but because she just had no hands.

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Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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