What is worse than going to school? Nothing.

joke hahhahahah where did u find that joke, on the internet

How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

When you wish upon a star... You are only seeing the light of that star, which has taken billions of years to travel here. The star that you are looking at has most likely dead, Just like your dreams.

Why dose my mom have a penis? She is a man

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What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

Your mom's so fat, she's is bigger than the average person.

Why is that man such a perv? I don't know. Ever since I let him see my boobs, he has had this undying obsession with sex. So, I guess that, as society would classify him, he is a sex addict. He will do anything for it, even if he needs a man to get it. I feel terrible about starting his obsession, and plan to take him to therapy next week for the sake of his health.

Why is it OK to make fun of a deaf person? Because they can't hear.

What's red, white and blue? You're mother on her period after she had sex. I don't know where the blue came from.

There are two cowboys in the kitchen. One says to the other, "I feel at 'home on the range.'" To which the other replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he realizes he's not pursuing what he truly loves.

A Blonde, Brunnette, and red head are on the beach. They find a sand gene and are each granted a wish. The Brunnette wishes for a yot. The Red Head wishes to never again get sun burn. The Blonde wishes for more sun. The world is overtaken and insinerated by the sun. An alien spaceship finds the Red head in a space suit floating around randomly when they ask how she survived she says "I don't sun burn"

What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

If life gives you lemons, you're setting up a bad joke

What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

Why was the 13 year old drug addict crying? Because somebody shot him in the foot

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

Roses are red, violets are blue, they really should be purple.

Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

A man told another,"You suck." The insulted man finished the sentence,"On juice boxes."

Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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