Roses are red Violets are blue This font is black You smell like shit

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why was 6 afraid of 7? Because ever since 3 died, 7 had changed. He had turned aggressive and randomly snapped and hit out at some of the other numbers for no apparent reason.

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What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

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What does a black person call black friday? Friday.

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what do you get when you cross ruddell with a chicken? still a prick

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1 + 1 = 2 If it was equal to 11 the problem would be impossible

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

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This is an anti- joke

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*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

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Why did the weiner dog have a bad childhood? Uncle Monty put his foot up its arse on a daily basis before chewing dorris's nose, ears and eyelids.

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What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

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Where did grandpa go for his birthday The morgue.

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Why do woman cook dinner? Because their husband has 6 jobs and is trying to support his family so she does a part and cooks dinner.

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yo mama so old that back in her school she didnt have history class

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am Jack Bauer, Where is the nuke?

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Yo momma so ugly, she makes french people say "you are ugly" in whatever language they speak.

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How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

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Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

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How to pick up chicks Pick up a chicken but must be a baby

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-What did the old lady have for dinner? -Dementia

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One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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