Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

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Q. What do you call a child with no friends or family A. Adopted

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Why did the bunny cross the road? Because it waited until a car was driving by and then got run over.

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How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

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What's the opposite of white? Black. You're racist. You fapped.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead got into a street fight. who won? The redhead because she had a gun.

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Their was three black men that walked into a bar. They then ordered three drinks and had sex... I lied about walking into a bar

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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3 black guys are in the back of a car. Who is driving? A taxi driver

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why did Johnny play piano with one hand? Because he lost his other one in a mining accident when he was 10. Johnny lives in rural Perú so he had to support his 6 younger brothers and sisters by working in a child factory.

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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A: Do you like it B: No

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Why did the car stop To buy drugs

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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Please ignore this statement.

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Why was the tree sad? Trees cannot think or move, and thus cannot feel emotions.

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Why was the woman arrested for trying to have sex with a miner? Because he was on the job and her advances were completely unwanted.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Just smoked some Meth nelnfjknfkjnwkejnkjnwefkjnKJNFKJRNFKWNEFEJNFJNWKEJNWFKEJFN

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How do you scare a plumber? Kill his family.

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What did the judge say to the criminal? I sentence you to a life time of solitary confinement.

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What's worse than getting raped by a duck? Getting raped by two ducks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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