What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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What do you call a clock that neither ticks nor tocks? A broken clock

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What do you call a broken boomarang? A stick.

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What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

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How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

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Random link time! http://www.booksie.com/thrillers/novel/declan_mckimm/pure-evil

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Once upon a time in a far away kingdom, people lived in it. The End.

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An astronaut, a nun and a fireman walk into a bar. They all order something to drink as they have all had a busy day.

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A man walks into a bar... OW!!!

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A guy walks in to a bar and says to the bartender "I'm fed up with all these 'guy walks into a bar' jokes on anti-joke. The bartender says "I have no idea what you're talking about".

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How does a dyslexic person read the word 'schitzophrenia'? Schitzophrenia. I leid abuot teh dyslxeia.

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Why was the boy in hospital? He fell off the bus and was run over by many cars.

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What did Bambi say to her mother when her mother was killed? Nothing. Bambi's a deer. Duh.

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Q: what did Don Draper do after he saw an attractive woman at the ABC store? A: went home and thought about her while drinking his scotch.

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What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

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Daniel G. Likes to perve on the boys in the locker room. Change quick guys!

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3 men walk into a bar, and the fourth guy behind them had the sense to duck under it.

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A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

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How do you confuse a black man? Call him from a blocked number and I say "I love you"

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? the redneck got to him first.

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whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

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Why did Hitler kill himself He saw his gas bill

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Why can't the orphan play baseball? He can't find home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops