Today is jessica's birthday and she is turnig 6 She walks in the living room to tell her dad its her birthday. Jessica"Dad, Dad guess how old i am today!" Dad "How old?" Jessica"6 dad im am 6". she walks into the kitchen to tell her Grandad Jessica" papa papa guess how old i am today" Grandad"Well for me to know this you would have to take of your panties" as he tells her she did as she was told. her grandad fingers her and smells her panties. He tells her "You are 6 today" Jessica"How did you know" Grandad"I listen as you told your dad in the dinning room".

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar... They then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, harmony and understanding between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, they truly can coexist, and decide to pursue peace among one another and the rest of society.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police, your entire family died in a car accident. ... ... The police, your entire family died in a car accident who?

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A jew enters a mall.

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what hurts more than getting shot in the arm Getting shot in both arms!

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Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

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Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

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Why did the little girl with no arms an legs cry? Because she fell off the swing.

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How do you make Lady Gaga sad? You kill her family.

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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nothing drews nose is f**ing hilarious

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What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

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How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

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What do you call a pool full of black people? a pool full of black people.

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roses are red violets are red the whole world is red i started the holocaust

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When the boy cried wolf who heard him? Not Helen Keller

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a tub of KFC

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So there's a black man riding a bike down the street. A police officer pulls him over to tell him that his back tire seems to be flat. The black man says thank you, and continued riding his bike. Later, he would repair his tire.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

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How do you tell if an alien had been in your house? All your lightbulbs are gone and your fridge is pregnant.

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Why did little Billy not eat all his carrots? He does not care about his vision.

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A family walks into a talent agent's office. They do a cute family-friendly performance that they call "The Aristocrats."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops