Oh na na not today Oh na na maybe tommrow

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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Why Bono always walk barefoot ? Because he's an asshole.

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chuck norris was shot yesterday... tomorrow is the bullets funeral.

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roses are red violets are blue i bribed a hobo to eat my poopoo

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Guy gets new car. TRANFORMER!

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how many friends does tomas have 0 he is a loner

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There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

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Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

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Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he needed to go to work to help pay for his dying daughter's cancer treatment

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Did the single mother survive the plane crash? No.

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

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Once, there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Jimmy

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what did the turnip say to the plum? nothing, as most fruits and vegetables would've said

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Q: What do you call a blonde, a brunette, and a red head all who are 16 years old and standing in a school? A: High School Students

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

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What did the cowboy say when he went into the car showroom in Germany? He commented on the models and designs, and asked to try a few out. Then he left, saying he would consider buying one but didn't want to commit too suddenly or too soon.

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A pair of brothers walked into a bar. It was where the wake was being held from their mother's funeral.

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Hey

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What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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