What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

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Q: What lives in holes? A: Jerks.

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Roses are red Violets are red Bushes are red Why's my garden on fire?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He felt like crossing roads that day.

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The umpire asked the baseball coach "Who is that on 1st base?" The baseball coach said "Who." The umpire said "Yes, that's what I'm asking." The baseball coach handed the umpire a list of his players to avoid any further confusion.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. It was in the middle of winter and they froze to death.

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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Q. What do you get when you cross a bird with a human? A. Arrested.

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Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

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How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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why wasnt the baby cute? -because it was dead

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because black people are usually stronger than chicken. If they weren't, chickens would probably eat fried black people.

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Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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Your flying on a canoe, and one of the wheels breaks off. How many pancakes does it take to fix it? Trick question there is a gorilla on board.

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Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

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A wife asks her husband to treat her like she's special. So he tells her, "Gooooooooooo... Maaaaaaaaaaaaake... Meeeeeeee.... Aaaaaa.... Saaaaaaaandwitch

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hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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How do you stop a plane? Land it.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A very unfortunate blind fish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops