A man asks a young woman at a party if a rag smells like chloroform. She doesn't respond because she's passed out. He takes her to a nearby bedroom, rapes her, and leaves the party promptly. He'll probably victimize many other women with this method.

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your goin down...aint no tomorrow...wha bang bang

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What's the difference between you and a bucket of shit? The bucket and the shit. You're a human being.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

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Why isn't Pluto a planet? Because it mutilated my dog

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Your mom is so fat that her Body Mass Index is 30,?which is considered obese, she should really try to lose some weight.

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Q: Santa Clause, the Tooth Fairy, and a rich mexican jump out of the plane at the same time. Who hit the ground first? A: The answer is none of the above, because they don't exist.

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Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

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I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

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yo mother is so fat, the recursive function computing her mass causes a stack overflow.

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a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

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Why did Justin Bieber wake up Lady Gaga? He needed to ask her a question.

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why was the girl eating a pie , because she were hungry

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John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

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How many are in a baker's dozen? 12 bakers

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Why did sara fall out of the tree? -she had no arms.. Knock knock. -who's there? not sara.

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Chuck Norris once round-house kicked someone so hard that he broke his leg.

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- have you heard about the guy who got the left side off the body cut off? - no. - He died

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Whats two plus two Four!

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Throughout her entire pregnancy Sheniqua smoked, drank, and did many narcotic drugs such as heroin and cocaine. Why did she lose her baby before coming to term? Because I strangled her to death for being black.

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What happens when a chemist dies? They are given a proper funeral and buried.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a psychopath

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My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm gonna screw you and you don't have a clue !

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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