What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

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What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

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Whats 1+1? The answer!

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I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC.

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Q: Whats the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

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Why was the boy crying? he was so happy his mom bought him a playstation 3

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whats sad about 4 black guy drivein off a cliff in a cadalic a wast of good cadalic

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Why did the boy die? He got hit by the school bus.

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what has 911 got in commen with most bank robberies? all r inside jobs

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What did Tiger Woods do when he saw a woman taking her shirt off? He looked the other way so he could make his birdie putt

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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What's funnier than a chicken? nothing.

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why wouldn't the man's car work? because it was broken.

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Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

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What does Malcolm X think about when hes horny? Sex!

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what happens when a migit and a horse have sex..... probably nothing

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A black duck walks into a bar. Duck: "I'll have a beer." Bartender: " How you paying for that?" Duck: "Put it on the tax payers."

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A black man, a chinese man, and a dog decide to have a race. Unfortunately, they are shot by a sniper on a roof while still in the planning stages.

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Q - What's the difference between a Park Bench and a Black Man ? A - The Park Bench can support a family.

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what did I say to myself nothing because its very weird to talk to your self

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops