What do you call a dead guy under the ocean? Murder.

Who can walk on water? Not the guy in the wheelchair.

suzy took a bath with bubbles what?......... I'm sure bubbles is a nice guy

Roses are red Violets are blue Its 2 in the morning Go the f+%& to sleep.

Whats yello and cant swim A bus full of dead children in a lake

What do you call the offspring of an elephant? A baby elephant.

What is worse than a badly told joke? A badly told Anti-joke.

Two lions are walking down the street. One lion says to the other, "where is everybody?"

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

What's the difference between oreos and your opinion? I asked for your opinion.

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!

How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

eoin burgin is fat

what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

Your dads so fat he needs to go on a diet

prison isnt fun it also is bland kidnapping is a crime but get in the van

why did the kid get in trouble. Because he put this up in typing class -charles hall aka chuckles

How do you get girls to watch a crappy movie? Tell them Taylor Lautner is in it.

white or wheat? wheat please.

A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

A man walks into an airport. He is sexually taken advantage of by TSA employees and suffers from severe depression for years after, eventually becoming gay and divorcing his wife. He then goes on a quest to discover the name of the man who took advantage of him. Once found, the man kills the employee and his family, commits acts of necrophilia upon his corpse in a slightly erotic display of revenge and stalks airports for the rest of his life, fruitlessly attempting to quench an insatiable bloodthirst for TSA workers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...