what did John do to make the cold weather a little less irritating? well, being a homeless man, John did..... nothing.

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Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

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What's three times More dangerous than a war? Three wars

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Why would Obama like to be ahead of some guy's poll and bent over at the same time? Because being ahead in someone's poll is encouraging news for his election campaign and bending over is part of the exercise program he uses to stay in shape.

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their was a black man in my family tree hes still hanging on

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how how does a black man jump. the same way anyone else does

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If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

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what's round, hairy, has eight legs- but isn't a spider? A spider.

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Why was the bus company sued? For substandard national safety regulations

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What's sad about Justin bieber getting thrown off of a cliff Nothing

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where did you get those clothes? at the toilet store.

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Q: What did the dog say to the owner when he took him to the vet? A: Nothing. It's a dog. It can't talk.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

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A man walks in to a bar. Ouch.

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Why did Gary have severe learning difficulties? Because his mother drank a lot of alcohol while she was pregnant, and it harmed his development significantly.

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Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

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How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

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How many moose does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it is biologically and theoretically impossible for a moose to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

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Can u explode on me.......Plz.........no........ok.

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What did the farmer say to the duck? I don't know, but the duck doesn't give a f.....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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