a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

cool story babe. now go make me a sammich.

The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

whos on the right track? lady gaga

Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

A man walks into a bar. What does he say? Ouch!

What did the litlle boy get for christmas? The toy which he could only dream about. His father got cancer.

A man fell in a hole. He's dead now...

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

-What did the old lady have for dinner? -Dementia

what do you call five mexicans pushing a truck up a hill? Five mexicans stuck in the middle of nowhere looking for an auto mechanic.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow You were probably expecting a poem or something but no this is just a gardening fact

there are 2 muffins in an oven one says "man its hot in here" the other says "shut up i hate this joke"

Why do people on this website suck? Because they are n i g g e r s and jews!

What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

what do you get when you cross ruddell with a chicken? still a prick

Why would a baby cry? Because it's being put through a juicer.

sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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