A dyslexic atheist stays up at night wondering if there is a Dog

Why didnt the homeless man eat the cheese? Because he died right before he ate it. :-(

Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack sat on his candle, and burnt his ass.

Have you seen the clown hiding from gay people at walmart?

When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

knock knock

Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

Shltskc gw? G

What's brown and smells like shit? Shit.

what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

Whats the difference between a pizza and your mom? Your mom's a bitch.

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

Everybody love food when they are hungry

What did the traffic light say to the car? dont look at me am changing.

What happens when your scared half to death...twice!!? Nothing, being scared half to death is an expression, you should not be fearing for your life.

What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

How do you help a chronic drug addict? Buy him or her more drugs. They NEED it.

How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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