What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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why wasnt the baby cute? -because it was dead

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How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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How does a Welshman take a shit? Like anyone other human being does.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Beat her with a spatula while in a mankini with a dildo up your ass!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

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How many baby's does it to paint a wall red? It depends how many you throw.

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But that just reinforces the negative stereotype that women don't have penises.

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Sorry wrong door.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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scenario: two teddy bears wrestling under water question: how many apples does it take to tussel with a potato answer: 96 becouse pillows dont eat chease

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

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what did the homeless kid get for christmas? nothing he probably doesn't know what christmas is

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Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

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Why did Little Suzie fall off her bike? I hit her with a shovel. Why did little Suzie die? I hit her with a shovel and she fell off her bike.

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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There were two friends, a girl and a boy. The girl had a ribbon tied to her neck, and every day the boy asked her why, yet she'd never tell him. They grew up together, and fell in love and still, she wouldn't tell him why she had the ribbon on her neck. They got married, and grew old, and still she wouldn't tell him. But one day, she said to him 'I'll show you why I keep this on my neck' and she took it off and her head fell off.

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Has anyone else noticed that the very least popular and the most popular anti-joke on this site are both related to the Holocaust.

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Q. why did the skeleton crosse the rood. A. he didin`t becas he had no guts

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Why did children rejoice when Michael Jackson died? Because they were at a birthday party, and only heard about his death afterward.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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