knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

A man offered a little boy a ride home. He drove the boy home where his father preceeded to beat him senseless.

A man walked into a bar....he's OK.

How did the Mexican cross the border without getting caught? He didn't; he was executed immediately.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

What has stripes, isn't a virgin, and has golden hands? I don't know I asked you first.

what's worse than stubbing your toe? a hospital fire.

10 years later...... a baby is born in Japan and has 26 toes due to radiation

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: He had no arms Q: Why did the frog fall out of the tree? A: He was stapled to the monkey's face

Lets just say I work for some important people, not the feds that is for sure, ill tell you when we meet, not here. As for my condition, lets just say that I am profusely bleeding noseblood now and that is because I forgot to take my medication, and if I had no medicaions at all, I would have begun bleeding out of me ears end eye sockets, and ironically id die from a lot of other shit before bleeding to death, so thats not even the case. Its nothing common, but I bet people could find out about it pretty fast on wikipedia, and as much as I like throwing shit on random people here, I dont like bothering anyone with my problems, in this case, it came kinda sudden and unexpected, and I dont mind sharing my deepest aspects including this with my best friends, of which one of them you clearly are love.

The worst part of waking up, Is no Folgers in your cup.

Blonde: Hey, what does "Idk" mean? Blonde's friend: "I don't know" Blonde: Thank you for telling me, that has been bothering me for quite some time now.

What the heck are you gonna do if you're on a picnic and have an ice cream and then the ants crawl on the ice cream, what are you gonna do? You're gonna eat the ants because it's made out of protein.

why did the chicken cross the road? the sudden lack of sidewalk dictated as such.

Why did the boy fail his test? Because he got shot before he could even study.

Yo mama so fat she at the rest of this joke.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

Why couldn't Jimmy have his birthday party at the park? Because little Jimmy passed away several months ago from the result of a vicious genocide committed by a man who didn't properly understand the affect that maiming human beings has on the friends and family members of the person; he was sentenced to jail for a fair and reasonable time for the punishment of the crime he committed in the past.

John: Knock Knock! Bill: Who's there John: John Bill: Oh hey John, come in

Whats the difference between and ? Blue custard

Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

why did the boy drop his ice cream? a terrorist dropped a bomb on him which turned into a transformer, raped him and then burried him inside of his refridgerator

Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

Did you hear about the sea cow who sang "Part of your Herd?" It was the Little Moomaid.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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