Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

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a man walks into the bar and gets knocked out

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No.

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Roses are red Violets are blue What about pansies

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What happened to the black guy who got pulled over by the cops? He was told that his left tail light was out

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why does the gay guy like anal-sex? because he's gay.

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If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

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How long does it take for britney spears to change a light bulb? Fish can not leave the water without dieing.

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What's better than eating an orange? Anal sex with Kim Kardashian.

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Why did the fat ugly bald Jewish man go to the bank? He needed to take out some cash because he was going out for lunch at a highly recommended restaurant.

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What's got 2 thumbs and a massive penis? A body parts collector I know called Harold Fortescue

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What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

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Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

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Yo mama so fat that she probably has a thyroid problem.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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what is big white and hurts when it falls on you out of tree? A refrigerator

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A man walks into a bar and orders a shot. The bartender asks to see his I.D. The man explains that he had lost his I.D. earlier in the day. The bartender then asked the man to leave, so he left.

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Women's rights.

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jack and jill went up a hill so jack could lick jills candy but jack got a shock and a mouth full of C O C K cause jill's real name was randy... ... and joe diragi liked it

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-Knock knok who's there? -Orange Orange who? -Orange you glad im an orange? ...I believe you have confused the noun "Orange" with the conjunction "aren't".

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A black guy NOT arrested for being black.

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Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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