Why did the sailor fall off the boat? Because vampires arent real.

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what do JFK, plato, and a dead penguin have in common? theyre all dead.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a serial killer.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue This poem makes no sense Trampoline

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What's the difference between a cow? Trick question—cows eat carrots!

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Easter? A: Diabetes

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What's the color of the sky when an airplane takes off? Blue. What are you, stupid?

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Why did the platypus have no friends? Platipi are antisocial creatures by nature.

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why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

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A blonde keeps walking down her driveway to her mailbox.Finally, her neighbor asks, "Why?" The blonde replies, "The computer says I've got mail."

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Why was Helen Keller such a bad driver? Cause she was blind, def, and mute. Thus making it difficult to drive.

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What did the chicken say to the.... nevermind

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What did the man say to the other man? I would have no clue because I am deaf

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Why did the boat sink I shot a missile at it

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What's the difference between a Obama and a drug-dealer? I don't know what? I don't know, I was asking if you know...

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An old lady at an atm told me to check her balance So i pushed her over

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

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A baby crawls into a bar. He cannot walk.

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why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Many of people would like to know this question. We have not invented a mind reading device and chickens can't communicate with humans. So no one knows

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Really sorry Red, I did not mean to leave you hanging, and I hope you wont leave me hanging either, I just need my meds or thinks can get ugly, my health, I can tell you and even show you what my condition is, and heck show you my meds, but there are certain things even I wont spread on horsehead network, you know, people are so bitchy here on the internet, and if people knew what I got, yeaaah, I may start getting green thumbs, and I HAAAAAAATE those. Seriously, on a scale of zero (my ass) to ten, how insane do you see me as?

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What do you call a black guy holding a crate of watermelons? a farmer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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