knock knock who's there your moms dead im sorry

A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

poopy is poopy

What did the transvestite say to the hypochondriac? "Ever been to Toledo?"

Roses are red violets are blue I'm not good at poems, nice titttttss.

What happened to the guy that got a perfect score on his S.A.T.'s? He was murdered.

Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

How do you get a drummer off your doorstep? Ask politely.

What is big, round, hairy, black with a little bit of white and red stripes, large feet, small hands, squinty eyes and a purple beret? Nothing. How ridiculous.

Okay.

Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo. Get in the van.

Why did the chicken cross the traffic filled road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? Chicken delivery.

What's worse than a bruise in your knee? A bruise in your other knee. And what is worse than that? The Holocaust. And what is worse than that? A second Holocaust, much bigger, with much more casualties.

whos gay and sits next to me? Griffen in my architecture class

No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

what happens when Pinocchio says "My nose is growing"?

Q. What is the best way to suicide? A. Kill yourself.

If Alex Maitland reads this he is gay

How do you get a clown off a swing? Take a chainsaw and cut the swing in half

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

TOFFEES HEAD LYING IN THE GRASS

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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