What's worse than finding out your dad has AIDS? Finding out your little brother also has it, but you and your mother don't.

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9 8 7

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What did Voldermort say to harry potter? i raped you mum last night!

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a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

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what is the most confusing day in the ghetto fathers day

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Justin Bieber

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What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

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How can you make a little boy tell the truth? Threaten to murder his family.

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Two guys walk into a bar. Whoops did I say bar? I meant Hiroshima 1945. They got radiation poisoning and died slow painful deaths.

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So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

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Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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If a tree falls on a woman, and no one is around to hear it, what is a tree doing in the kitchen?

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Roses are red, But ravens are black, Please go to China, and never come back!

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What do you call someone who's father is black (born in Kenya), mother is white (born in Canada), and was himself born in Australia? Someone with tri-citizenship

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what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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what is behind your butt? DEEZ NUTS

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What city likes baseball the most? New York

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You stink so bad that you should cleanse yourself via shower and/or bath.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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