How do you get 100 Jews into a Volkswagon? You don't. It's impossible to fit that many people into a car that small.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A blond and his wife were in the hospital expecting their first child together. The wife gives birth to twins and the husband turns to her and says, "I can't believe we had twins. I'm so happy!"

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

yo mama is so ugly she walked by a mirror and looked at her reflection cuz thats what mirrors do

thumb_up thumb_down +17

In Soviet Russia, blonde is smart

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why was Martin Luther King shot? The shooter strongly disagreed with his viewpoints.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a black man in the south? An example of diverse America

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are red, Violets are brown, F*** who's had a shit in my garden.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock knock Who's there? Dishes Dishes who? Dishes a bad joke

thumb_up thumb_down +17

XD, I know I noticed myself, I was like "why the fuck did I post that shit?" Rellez XD okay sistah, I think I am just gonna get some sleep now, but Nero, is not Justin Bibble the first one?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? As a matter of fact, I do. It goes: "Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? NaBrO."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

willam dafoe

thumb_up thumb_down +17

There are 3 guys named:Poop, Shut up and Manners. They all were speeding down the street, they took a sharp turn and Poop fell out of the back. A cop pulled them over while Manners got out to go get Poop. The cop says, "whats your name." "Shut up." "No seriously whats your name." "Shut up" he says a little bit harsher. "Wheres your manners?" the cop says. "Back there picking up Poop."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the fridge say to the watermelon? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops