My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

What is big, white, and heavy ? A fridge

Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

Things i like to do when im bored; chase after ostriches take major dumps masturbate give myself major erections EJ

You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

Once soon a time there was a boy named steven. He dropped his ice cream because... You know the rest

Q. why did the chicken cross the road A. damn it this joke is a million years old shut up

Why are all the tech support people from India? That's where the majority of call centers are located.

A man walks into a bar Ouch He broke his penis So he ate it Then he saw a little boy They shaved their pubic hair together He raped the little boy He walked into another bar Double ouch

Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

Why was little Tommy scared? Because he'd just been abducted by a psychopathic rapist.

Nero, sure you are okay?

why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get my ball back.

Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

What did the blonde order in the restaurant? A cup of coffee.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Teenage pregnancy.

what do you call a cat with no tail? smithers.

whats the difference between ur mom and my mom? nothing i slept with both of them

What's funnier than a joke book? 2 joke books.

What did the sleepy man say to his wife? I'm sleepy.

I'm typing this one handed... ... Because I'm an amputee.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing.

What do you call Anne Franks life? A big game of hide and go seek.

What did the fish say when it was being fried? That's crazy, fish can't talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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