Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? No neither have I

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A dog run after a squirrel. the pursuit didn't last long the squirrel climb a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

two men walk into a bar. they get a concussion.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why couldn't the black man support his family? He was the youngest child of 3 and already had a caring and supporting mother and father.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many police does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they all beat the room for being black.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what has 8 legs, is brown, and will bite you? my crap

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A Terrorist walks into an airport. - He then blows himself up.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why couldn't Danny learn the alphabet? Because a man of forty was staring at him in a very peculiar way and Danny found it very difficult to concentrate.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Love Chocolate, More Than I Love You

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What happens if a guy is gay? You call him Verl.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A black guy NOT arrested for being black.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Astyanax mexicanus, a subspecies of Mexican tetra that lives in a subterranean habitat and as such has structurally degenerate eyes that have atrophied over the course of evolution.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

One man calls emergency: - Come immediately, my little son has swallowed a condom! After five minutes, the same man calls back: - It is OK, I found another one.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

When life gives you lemons, you are most likely in the fruit section of the grocery store.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money, I forgot what happens right but it wasn't that funny anyway

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: What did the forgetful person say to the other? A:

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete jumped out, who was left? Pete, the boat blew up and instantly killed repeat

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar, they manage to have a delightful evening, despite their religious differences.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 went to war and when he came back, he was really messed up. One day he took 2 into a dark alley and beat him up really badly. Now, it's not just 6 who is afraid, but everyone.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Whats funnier then a dead baby a dead baby dressed as a clown

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops