so your in a room with mickey mouse and the lights go off, how did the lights go off mickey mouse turned them off

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Why did the girl have an abortion? Because she wanted a burger.

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How do you make someone cry? Shit on them

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What do you call a boy with no arm and no legs in a fire? Screwed.

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What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Sorry, I'm a poof.

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Dont listen to your heart all it dose is BEAT BEAT BEAT

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A Jew, a Russian, and a Turk walk into a bar. The Jew asks, "Can I get a glass of Manischewitz?" The bartender serves him. The Russian asks, "Can I get a shot of vodka?" The bartender serves him. The Turk then asks, "Can I get a Turkish coffee?" The bartender looks at him, confused, and says, "Sorry, but this is a bar. Unfortunately we don't serve coffee."

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue These are your Results You have Cancer

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what's the difference between your grandmother and a dead squirrel? Technically, if you burn them both, your grandmother will produce more ash, but apart from that, they are both useless pieces of carbon.

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Girls Lacrosse.

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how do you get an A in a class? idk never got on.

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Q: Why didn't johnny get any Christmas presents? A: Because he died in a house fire 3 years ago.

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People who are addicted to brake fluid just can't stop.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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What did the prison inmate get for Christmas? A warm chair to sit in

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If a hen lays an egg in the middle of a roof, which way would it fall? To the east, as there was a brisk wind in that direction.

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Tell me who you are, who you are working for, I wont tell anybody, and I will have someone to hack this site on the hour and remove these comments, please.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? The pig rolled in the mud!

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yo mamas so ugly she is often made fun of andridiculed about her appearance.

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What did the teapot say to the teacup? Nothing. Teapots and teacups are inanimate objects, therefore, cannot speak.

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So a man and a woman are siting at the same park table Woman: sir are you touching my leg erotically Man: No mam for you see I am a parapaligec

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What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

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What did the plane say to the ground when they hit each other Boom

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Why were you in an igloo? I don't know, why were you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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