roses are red, violets are blue, my name is dave, this makes no sense microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the man jump in front of the car? He was clinically depressed, his wife left him and took the kids, he just lost his job. He thought he saw a 20 dollar bill in the street So he stopped to pick it up, not realizing a car was speeding toward him.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why does Eric Clapton use a Mac? Because he prefers Macs.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is the biggest lie ever? "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Use"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Then none of us want to be right.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you make a man cry? you torture him

thumb_up thumb_down -8

ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

:( You are right Nero, I am terribly sorry, when I see you, I see the brightest man I have ever seen, should you ever turn against me and stop underestimating yourself, there is nothing I could do.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Haiku's are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigorator

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What does the fox say? A: Nothing. Foxes cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the boy dog say to the girl dog? Ruff

thumb_up thumb_down -8

My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

a man walked into a bar he had no recollection of entering the bar so he exited the bar

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A blonde just got a call from her boyfriend. He said i'll meet you at your house, so the blonde drove home, excited. Once the blonde got home her boyfriend was having sex with another girl. The blonde burst into tears and pulled out her gun then stuck it to her head. " No dont do it!" her boyfriend said!...... the blonde, not knowing what to do next said, " Shut up you cheater you're next!"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

John has 37 candy bars and eats 36 of them? What does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the bartender say to the upset horse? GET OUT OF MY BAR!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

AWWWWWW YEEESSSS!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What's a crutch's favorite song? A: Lean on me

thumb_up thumb_down -8

chuck norris once kicked a man verry hard that man proceded to lose contiosness and chuck norris was disqualified from the martial arts compatition

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did it take a long time to read the anti-joke? Because of the great amount of space between the question and the answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock Knock. Who's there? I left my car keys inside.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I believe if Floyd Mayweather fought Muhammad Ali I believe it would be a close fight but Floyd would win. Because Ali has Parkinson's

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops