Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. One polar says to the other, "Pass the soap please." And the other polar bear says, "No soap, radio!"

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What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno ask the chicken

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Why did the man die a slow and painful death? Because he kept submitting stupid, recycled anti-jokes over and over; so, I killed him.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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There was a boy named Steven, a son of a rich business man. Steven was an interesting child though, as he always kept care to one of his possessions. That possession being a plain, old, brown box. On Steven's fourth birthday his father said he could have anything in the world he wanted, just name it. Steven said he wanted two quarters to put in his box. The father agreed and gave his son two quarters to put in his box. Every year the father would say he could have anything he wished for, and Steven just asked for two quarters. Nothing more. On Steven's 18th birthday he got into a severe car crash. The father stood over the hospital bed where Steven lay. "I can get you the best doctors in the world. They can save you, please let me get you this for your birthday!" The boy shook his head. "All I want is two quarters" Steven replied. The father was distraught. "Son, tell me why you've wanted these two quarters every year you have been alive instead of anything else in the world". The boy complied. "Fine I'll tell you." Then Steven died before he could tell the father. The End.

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hear hear

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What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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How do you start a fire in the woods? Call Cole Ryder!

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-Knock knock -Use the doorbell -Oh... ding dong -Who is it? -Me -Oh -Yeah -Cool -Come in -Okay -Take off your shoes -Alright -How are you? -Good -That's good -Yeah -Okay -K -Oh -Bye -See ya

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? ... A boy played in mud.

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Tom and Ralph are In a verbal scuffle. Tom: your adopted ralf! Ralph: yes! Now I have lesser chance of high blood pressure!

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What did the boy call the man that kicked the cat? "Sad twat"

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Who the heck do you think you are?! Ally...duh

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Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

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A:Knock knock B:Who´s there? A:Beat B:Beat who? A:Beat your ass if you don´t open that door!!

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

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What do you call a blue bucket? A blue bucket. What do you call a red bucket? A blue bucket in disguise.

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What is the difference between Chuck Norris and a frog one wears pants and the Chuck Norris doesn't.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Whatever their names happen to be.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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