Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

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Why did the dinosaurs become extinct? Because they wanted to.

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roses are red violets are red everything is red who set my house on fire

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What did modern scientists say to Einstein? Neurtinos travel faster than the speed of light! :)

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2 penguins in a tub. one looks to the other an says, "pass the bar of soap." the other looks at him.."what do you think i am, a typewriter?"

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How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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Q: What do Ethiopians eat at night? A: Nothing.

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What did the blind pole vaulter say to the speed skater? Hi, how are you?

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What happened to the chicken that crossed the road. It got hit by a fridge.

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Major League Soccer

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass.

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Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

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what's white, got three legs and you wouldn't expect to find in the rainforest? A fridge on a stool

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What do you get when you mix red and yellow together? rellow

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what do you call a white and black girl 69? ying yang

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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A man watched his city burn. He was traumatized by the loss of his friends and family and went to therapy to recover.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Daddy drinks, Because you cry.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

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What happened to the dog that ate to much? It became obese.

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Why didn't Joe catch the baseball? He got shot by a local gang.

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How do you make a dog hate you for the rest of its life? Steal its bone and beheaded it.

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What sound does a dog make? WOOF What sound does a cat make? MEOW What sound does a giraffe make? ...

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Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the low cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops