So a black man steals a bike Because it was unlocked, and that was just poor planning.

While getting Sherrie's Crabcakes I was arrested by Missy Hepp highway patrol.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

I drink poodle juice for breakfast lunch and dinner I was then turned into a tree

roses are red, violets are blue, dandelions are yellow, tulips are pink, sunflowers are black and yellow, my dick is 13 inches long.

Roses are red Violets are blue You don't want to be my valintine I'm going to shoot myself.

Steve: Ask me if I'm a tree. John: Are you a tree? Steve: No.

Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Hello? Prankster: Hello is your regrigerator running? Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Yes... Prankster: Oh good. I was just calling to make sure. Have a good day!

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

A seal walks into a club. And proceeds to die. Why? The seal isn't able to walk so it was crawling and a man was swinging a club to it's head, so it perished and he could feed his family. The Statement was censored by the FCC

What is the worst place to be in race if you're racing with me Behind me

Why did the black man enjoy KFC. Because like many foods, it contains monosodium glutamate (MSG) a flavor enhancer that makes many foods taste better. It however had nothing to do with race or cultural background.

A woman says Renae has a butt... Two men say we don't care we have her hammer. True story.

Women age like a fine wine: sediment develops as they lose their tannins, and earthy notes of oak and mineral develop in their flavor profile, giving them a lengthened finish.

Why is 5 the best number? Because it's alive!

Q. What did the fat man say when he ate a salad? A. Yum.

69

Making fun of Charlie Sheen is like shooting up in a barrel.

Why was the hiker upset? He was plummeting 1,500 feet to the ground after tripping on a rock too close to a cliff.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because goats lay eggs.

Q: why did the prisoner drop his soap? A: easy sex

A man walked in a bar and asked for 10 shots. (not descriptively) The bar tender got his gun out and shot the man 10 times. Another man asked for three stabs at it. The bar tender stabbed him 3 times. The last man asked for a bomb load. The bar tender gave him 100's of granades. Then the man bombed down the bar with the bar tender inside

What did the German say to the Rabbi? Hello. The German was also Jewish

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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