Why did they use the phone as a football? Because it was a phone-ball.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

Why did the chicken cross the road? AIDs.

Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

My friend thinks he's smart, He said that onions are the only food that make you cry. So I threw a coconut at his face.

Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

What did the father give to his daughter? AIDS.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Sandwich.

What's the difference between a duck? An orange.

A man walks into a haunted house and screams. He had arrows on a nail.

Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

You're tearing apart, Lisa!

Why was the man burnt? Cause he fell in a fire

man 1.have u sen my girl friend man 2. yes man 1. rely man 2. no man 1. dick

Knock Knock. Who`s there? Hadooouuuuuuu! Hadou who? KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN! PERFECT!!! Perfect Bonus: 38493483948394839483984 Skill 0000000 Your life 0 Bonus 9001

a white man a black man and an asian man had a few drinks at a bar. they all died from alcohol poisoning

What's worse than seven babies in a trashcan? Not much.

What do you get when you cross a chicken and a dinosaur? You can't. Dinosaurs are extinct.

Knock Knock Whos there? Your mom My mom died three years ago, please go away while i cry.

What's the difference between you and a sick duck? I forget the rest but your mother's a whore.

A jew walks into a bar He receives a phone call and promptly leaves

A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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