what's worse than stubbing your toe? 9/11

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Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

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Michael J Fox may not be able to draw a perfect circle but he sure can jerk off like a champ

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Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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Why was the blonde on the train tracks? Because she was tied up by a madman on crack.

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Why did the maid clean the house? Because that's her job, ya moron.

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se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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Why 't the blonde dial 911? Because phones haven't had dials on them for at least 40 years or so. She can however punch it in on her keypad.

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Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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A man with no legs walks into a bar. Just kidding...

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my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

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A horse walked into a bar and asked for a pint. The barman said, 'Sorry, we don't serve horses.' Adele sighed and walked out.

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Why do i love this website? Because it is funny.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup.

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So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

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Why did the African cross the road? Because he was searching for his family after his village was massacred by rebel soldiers.

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whats worse than a 6 dead babies in a dumpster? You were babysitting them.

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View Terms of Service

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You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

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A van drives into a car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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