In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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Your mother is so fat, she tried to suicide because she was unhappy with her weight. She tried a diet and it didn't work; she suffers from depression and went to see a doctor about her weight. Life is getting worse for your mother and she is starting to develop diabetes. Your relatives and cousins are going to the hospital to visit her sometime this week; the doctor says she only has about a week left before she passes away.

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A: Knock Knock! B: RING THE DOORBELL YA DUMMY

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What's the song that goes like, duh duh da duh duh duh da da do?

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bar man a walks a into...DYSLEXIA IS NOT FUNNY.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Me. Oh.

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a light bulb Why? Because they're so darn stupid

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Is it better to be born black or gay? No way to know. That is, unless you are black and gay.

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What did the black person say to the other black person? Im really white, I just want to fell what its like to be black.

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what did the homeless man get for Christmas? RAPED.

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whats the difference between a bench and a mexican? a bench can support its family

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Why couldn't the gay man grow a beard? He shaved his face frequently.

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2 nuns in the bath, One says "wears the soap" the other says "Over there, next to the shampoo"

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When life gives you melons. You're not dyslexic because you can probably tell the difference between a lemon and melon because they look so different.

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Yo mama so fat that when she goes to the movies she sits next to everybody.

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An Asian walks into a bar with his girlfriend He proceeds to buy himself and her food Pays Then leaves

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You're Like A Book I Want To Put You Down

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Yo momma stank so bad, she might have a serious vaginal infection. You should take her to the hospital.

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Q.Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? A.One is a human and the other is an inanimate object used to give people a rest.

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Why was the little girl sad? Why???? Because an elephant stamped on her, and shat on her.

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A American seeking into mexico

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Why was the potatoe hot Cuz I cooked it

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Q: what do u call a plane that flies A: a plane

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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