Nope, I mean you can try, but my phone is busted and the code on the chip my galpal here managed to finally get into the cell, has sixteen digits so damn small that none of us can read it,

A blind man watches TV

are u black unlucky

Why did the woman pay $5,000 for a gallon of milk? She didn't. She paid $2.99.

Roses are Tits Violets are Tits I love Tits TITS!

What junk did she have in her trunk? Mcdonalds because shes fat as hell.

How do you beat a black in sports. "shot him when the game starts"

Why couldn't the little kid get to sleep? His dog was on fire

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

what is the difference between a bucket of shit and a black person? the bucket the bucket

Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

Hello, I'm Mark and I have multiple-personality disorder. Don't listen to him, no he doesn't.

Q: Were did suzy go after the explosion? A: Everywere

why did the skeleton drop his juice? Because he has no stomach LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

what smells like tuna? my underwear

A black man walks into a bar. "Whoops, that's not the Weed shop!"

How many cavemen does it take to change a lightbulb? A caveman wouldn't know what to do with a lightbulb.

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

why did dinosaurs get extinct? i don't know i was not there to see it!!!!!!!!!

Hi my names Sarah and I love baby's. I don't think I could eat a whole one though

What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

What did Billy say when he met the president? Nice to meat you Mr. President? -Louis

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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