if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

There is a boy in a school............. SUDDENTLY, PEDOBEAR APPEARS!

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

You know who else sucks dick? My aunt Jane. She was forced to become a prostitute after she got fired from her job.

What's white and sticky? A marshmellow.

What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

Blonde: what does IDK stand for? Brunett: i don't know Blonde: NOBODY KNOWS!!!

Why is moral man a great Cerebrity? you would not get it, its too cerebral... Moral: I SAID LEAVE HIM ALONE PLEAAAAAAAAAASE! BUAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

A apple a day keeps gramar away.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the marginal benefit of doing so exceeded the marginal cost.

Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in a zoo don't be mad I'll be there too not in a cage but laughing at you

Why did Mary fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock, Whos there, Not Mary

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

Why does manure smell like poop? Because it is poop.

What do black people and asians have in common? arms

Why did the white boy not make his high school basketball team? Because he was not as good as the other players.

I agree Detroit sux. But the bulls suk too ya know

Why did the black man get a zero on his SAT? He was up so late helping orphans with disabilities that he fell asleep during the test.

Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

whats black and hangs from my tree a plum

Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

A man walks into a bar, he obtains an alcoholic beverage from the store neighboring this bar which he bumped into.

If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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