Why did the Mexican mow his neighbors lawn? Because the Mexican was 12 years old and his neighbor was paying him $20 to mow the lawn.

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple But nothing rhymes with purple.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was Dead.

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Will I be watching The Voice tonight? no.

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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How did Billy tip the cow? He didn't, cows are animals and that would be wrong.

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What's up? Your time.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A bike.

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How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

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Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

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Why the chimp fell off the tree? Because it's dead.

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Why is it irrelevant whether someone is a twat or not? Love your neighbour.

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Why did the man yell at his wall? Because it jumped out and scared him when he walked past

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call a bad yo mama joke? your mom

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what's the difference between northerners and southerners? southerners live to the south of birmingham, and they don,t stink of urine.

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Knock knock.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot was a potato.

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oh no a butt!!!!!!!!!! your stubid oh wait your right ahhhhhhhhhh

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what kind of sex did ethan have? webcam sex

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how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

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What do you call a chair in the middle of the road? A danger to drivers.

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If life gives you lemons, You have a problem and you might need medicine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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