Whats blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz. Whats pink and fuzzy? Blue fuzz that's embarrassed.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

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How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

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how do you wake up lady gaga? poker face

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what is blue and fuzzy? Blue Fuzz

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What's green and red all over? That terminally ill child's vomit.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a car? I don't have a car in my garage.

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Knock knock. who's there? your dead cat, here you go.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

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What's funnier than cancer? Just about anything. There's nothing funny about terminal illnesses.

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What happened when the man turned on his TV? It was tuned to the Discovery Channel

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How do you kill a mime? Shoot him in the face.

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Little Timmy enjoyed school He went to Sandy Hooks

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Elvis presley was taking a poop and couldnt poop cause he was dead.

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How many women does it take to ski across the pit of lava? None, they would burn and die.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What do you get when you cross a Pigeon with a Mailbox? A Carrier Pigeon, they are extinct now.

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if chuck norris had 5 dollars and you had 10 dollars you would have 5 dollars more than Chuck Norris

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I am dyslexic

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whats funny about this joke? nothing.

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Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got hitted by a drunken driver and died last week, when he was cycling to school.

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Mr. Wonder, optimism is seeing the glass as half full, pessimism as seeing the glass half empty, and realism as not seeing the glass at all.

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When you say that Chuck Norris has counted to infinity twice. I say that you cant count to infinity because it isnt a quantifyable number

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Why is the Mexican a gardener? He has a mental disability that makes him unable to do more than a simple task.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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