God wrote this joke.................................

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A shocking example of the cruelty suffered by animals at hands of humanity.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

thumb_up thumb_down +16

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Interrupting Doctor" "Interrupting Doc-" "You have Cancer'

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

thumb_up thumb_down +16

anti-joke.ru - russian style

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A german police officer sees a Rabbi. Nothing happens, it's 2011

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q: Why can't Carl drive? A: Carl is a stone

thumb_up thumb_down +14

one day a guy walks into a bar. he buy's a drink then walks hapily home by Mad James

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what is the difference between a puppy and a baby... ...they are different animals

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the Jewish man say to the banana? Nothing, because he has common sense

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the trombone player have sex so often? Because he was hot.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you teach another person's son to ride a bike? You don't. Let his real parents teach him to ride a bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man walks into a bar. He suffers a fatal concussion and the playground is shut down by local police until proper padding is installed.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bees stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings. Now, if you have been well-educated you should be able to tell the problem with this joke. Unless you know someone whos jewish and lived during the holocaust, you couldn't be sure if three bee stings was actually worse than the holocaust. If ou do however, thats good for you, keep it to yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did suzy get in the car? She wanted to go somewhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did Jimmy get for his first bithday A coffin

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops