What do you call two black men walking down a stairwell? Their names.

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What did Steve say when his leg got chopped off? Nothing, he went into a state of shock before blacking out due to loss of blood. Later on, he died, and a week later, a funeral was held, in which nobody showed up, because nobody cared for Steve.

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There once was a man from Kentuckit, who like to dissapear with his dog and clean up the shit using a plastic bag and put it in the allocated public bin.

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knock knock who's there BANG!! BANG!! BANG!! BANG!! who OPEN THE DOOR ITS THE POLICE

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What did the doctor say to the obese person? You have diabetes.

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How's the weather? Good.

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Why do all gingers get mad all the time except having sex? Because they enjoy it!!!

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but his stomach was not big enough to finish. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free meal.

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Q: What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole? A: A pedophile.

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Helen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it "NUuhHUhhuUUUuhhhuuuuumph!"

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what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

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Nineteen terrorists walk into three airports. Several hours later, thousands of people are dead sending the world into a state of emergency that subsequently changed how we live our current lives under the constant threat of both government oppression and extremist terrorism.

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A Blonde, Brunnette, and red head are on the beach. They find a sand gene and are each granted a wish. The Brunnette wishes for a yot. The Red Head wishes to never again get sun burn. The Blonde wishes for more sun. The world is overtaken and insinerated by the sun. An alien spaceship finds the Red head in a space suit floating around randomly when they ask how she survived she says "I don't sun burn"

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What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

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laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer, then you will die.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a mustang? I don't have a mustang in my garage..

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how do you see the difference between a ceiling and a floor? people dont walk on a ceiling

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

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Q: What's blue and smells like grass? A: Blue grass.

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Why did the boy drop his peanuts and crackerjacks? He had a sudden heart attack and died at the age of 10

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Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

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What's white and can't jump? A fridge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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