Roses are red Violets are blue Some roses are white 72.4% of Americans are too

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Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

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a little kid goes as candle for halloween, 69 girls blew him teenage boy goes as candle for halloween, all he got was burned

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Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

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What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor? Monks do not speak.

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people on this site vote for anti-jokes that make them laughed

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You read this in school as the kid sitting next to you stares at his computer screen.

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Whats blue, green and red, and runs trough the strees each sunday? ...What? I have no idea, I was hoping you did.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Q: What's grey and can't climb trees A: A car park

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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What's brown and sticky? The stuff that comes out of your anus

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What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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A blond, a brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They all die of starvation.

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life is like a penis, short but feels long when it's hard.

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How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

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There was once a family of tomatoes. A daddy tomato a mommy tomato and a baby tomato. they decided one day to take a walk. but the baby was taking forever so the daddy tomato walked back STOMPED on him and yelled "CATCHUP"

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So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

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What did the church say to the house? You need jesus

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what is a present you would give a werewolves? I said... OBAMA!!! tee hee

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TELL

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Do you know why the Mexican didn't like hot dogs? I don't know either.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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